Life, and the future of books...

Still have not found a job, and may have to do what I took a course for recently. It is discouraging, but I am reminded that life has it ups and downs, and I am dealing with the downs right now. Heck, the entire area where I live is dealing with life being uncertain for everybody. With summer coming, we older folk will competing with returning college students and high school students.

I am working on a proposal for a project, I just need to stop being lazy and become seriously focused about doing what I want to accomplish. Recently, I realized that I may have to volunteer my time to get my project off the ground. I do not have a problem with that, I just hope that it will not be a waste of time, and that I will make some valuable contacts.

I am a reader and this online article made me think, and although everybody probably spends more time online, I think reading from an actual bound book is still more appealing.

We missed the Kilpatrick Gravy Train......

These last several months, I kept hearing about the so called "Friends and Family Plan" of Mayor Kilpatrick's. After seeing in print Saturday how much those folks made as city employees, I now understand why some city employees are pissed off. I just did not know that those folks were doing so well. There are going to be some mad folks downtown today.....

"2002-2007: Who got the

Biggest Raises?"

Detroit Free Press story May 10, 2008
Sources: City of Detroit, research by Free Press staff writers M.L. ELRICK and KRISTI TANNER

This chart lists all of Mayor Kwame Kilpatrick's appointees who have served from 2002 through July 2007, the latest period for which the city provided salary information. Appointees with close connections to the mayor or former Chief of Staff Christine Beatty have tended to receive higher salaries and raises than other mayoral appointees. Most of those who received significant raises assumed new responsibilities or were promoted.

Name	'02 salary	'07 salary	% inc.
Kwame Kilpatrick	$176,000	$176,000	0%
Christine Beatty	$140,001	$142,813	2%

Note: Christine Beatty and Derrick Miller did not receive a significant salary
increase because they were hired at top salary.

Friends and family

Name	'02 salary	'07 salary	% inc.
April Edgar	$38,000	$70,500	86%
Ajene Evans	$32,500	$57,500	77%
Lawrence Hemingway	$65,000	$112,499	73%
Medina Abdun-Noor	$62,500	$100,001	60%
Jacquelyn Watts	$48,500	$76,810	58%
DeDan Milton	$42,500	$66,810	57%
Kandia Milton	$65,500	$91,300	39%
Akua Bragg-Porter	$57,500	$79,999	39%
Elizabeth Benson	$79,704	$105,500	32%
Beverlyn Hilton	$57,500	$75,001	30%
Nneka Cheeks	$50,500	$62,025	23%
Chantel Clemons	$57,500	$70,000	22%
Ray Cheeks	$89,000	$93,503	5%
Alice Beatty	$43,500	$44,814	3%
Sandra Ramsey	$85,000	$86,700	2%
Derrick Miller	$140,001	$142,813	2%

Average '02 salary: $67,924

Average '07 salary: $86,976

Other mayoral appointees

Name	'02 salary	'07 salary	% inc.
Latonya Hardiman	$32,500	$85,501	163%
Tanjia Wilkerson	$33,500	$60,500	81%
Rosalind Worthy	$34,522	$52,500	52%
Margaret Ceballos	$20,500	$27,549	34%
Crystal Turner	$26,000	$34,145	31%
Anthony Boyer	$30,200	$32,600	8%
Shelia Cusic	$30,200	$32,600	8%
Johnnie McElvene	$30,200	$32,600	8%
Barbara Moore	$30,200	$32,600	8%
Deloris Palmore	$30,200	$32,600	8%
Iva Patterson	$30,200	$32,600	8%
Barbara Toney	$30,200	$32,600	8%
Vernita Wardlow	$30,200	$32,600	8%
Kreed Lile	$32,500	$34,145	5%
Ecole White	$32,500	$34,145	5%
Carl Ramsey	$57,500	$59,237	3%
Joycel Malcolmcarr	$45,000	$45,900	2%

Average '02 salary: $32,713

Average '07 salary: $40,848

Albom Away...............................

I have a theory..............

I think Detroit Free Press Columnist Mitch Albom is ready to
move on to greener pastures.

This area is a major hockey fan base, and to question the locals' sincerity as fans is like inciting a bull run.

Mitch wrote in his May 9, 2008 Detroit Free Press column: (entire column can be found here)

<<"Wings come out big, so why don't all the fans?

The Wings did their part.

Now what about us?

Plenty of empty red seats

Before I spend one more word on how good our hockey team played Thursday night, I have to say how bad it looked to see so many empty seats at Joe Louis Arena. Cheaper seats. Expensive seats. Empty clusters. Half-empty rows.

Hey, this ain't Nashville, folks.

This is Detroit, Hockeytown, where every seat should be filled, because these are the conference finals, the bridge to the championship, against Dallas, a team that hasn't been here for the playoffs in 10 years. That last time was a war that ultimately led to a Detroit Stanley Cup.

Remember the Cup? We loved that thing. We felt like we earned it -- every step. So what's the problem now? I know the economy is bad. I'm not telling people to hock the jewelry or find a job.

But we're not talking 100,000 spots here, either. There are enough fans and money in our area to fill those absent clusters. Hey, if we can fill Lions seats, we can fill Red Wings seats..........

.............OK. End of lecture. I don't know if those tickets weren't sold (bad) or just not used (worse). I know only that if the Wings win seven more games, if they capture the Cup, if they keep up this excellence and they do it with this many empty seats, we don't deserve the name Hockeytown. And it'll be our loss....">>

Judging from that column, I believe Mitch had to know that he was going to stir up a hornets nest with the public when posing that question. After all with a talk show and being a writer, he is no stranger to controversy going back to the 2004 story fiasco regarding two NBA players, Mateen Cleaves and Jason Richardson, who attended a Final Four game to cheer for their school, Michigan State University. Later it came out that they did not go to the game, and The Detroit Free Press and Albom had to issue an apology for the story.

The recent response to the latest column was so heavy that the Detroit Free Press had to actually encourage the readers to respond in the forum set up for Mitch's column. Although I am not a Red Wing Hockey fan, even I felt that the tone of the article came off as condescending and elitist. Besides being a columnist, sport reporter, and radio talk host, Mitch Albom has written several books with two of them becoming best sellers and made for TV movies. I have already ascertained that Mitch is pretty well heeled, since I am part of the millions that purchased one of those best sellers that I can't even resell on Ebay's saturated market.

Occasionally I listen to his talk show on WJR radio. I commend comic-former engineer Ken Brown for hanging in there with Albom's lapses in pompousness. I guess working at GM prepared him for the job. Ken, who keeps it together when I sense at times he wants to put a foot up somebody's behind, truly knows what he is dealing with. I have to give it to Mr. Brown, especially after seeing that geeky outdated photo on the WJR site, for sometimes bravely providing eloquent responses and still getting paid for the gig. Otherwise, had he not found his calling, Ken could have been a laid off engineer like many others in this region.

Perusing the Free Press Forums last week, I came across a lot of angry responses, some also threatened Mr. Albom with physical harm. Even white folks that still have good paying jobs can't afford the high cost of the tickets to the Red Wings Playoff games. According to some of them, even if they could, gas pricing, and parking fees makes attending a hockey playoff game prohibitive. In addition, with the current political scandal enveloping the city and the fear of being a crime victim, is reason enough for some to boycott all events held in Detroit.

Everybody in the world knows that Michigan is hurting economically. There are many folks from all walks of life that are trying to survive this economic recession (almost depression) in this state. Even folks in Grosse Pointe are now using a state issued Bridge Card to buy food now. (Being unemployed also, I guess I better drop my pride and get me one too, but they don't take them at Eastern Market where I get more for my money there than at Krogers and other major grocery stores in Detroit...) Cost of living has went up (especially food and insurance!), but the gas costs has really taken a bite of many citizens' entertainment budget, if in fact they still have one.

So being just a common citizen, I had to wonder if Mitch Albom understood that, or was he just trying to elicit a response from the general public for a future column? Is there a radio syndication deal in the works? Or did Mitch Albom make a wager with Illitch to see if he could play the Pied Piper for the Red Wings?

A shadow of her former self.....

I may get razzed about this, but I still sometimes can not help but feel sorry for Christine Beatty as I see the Mayor move on with his life. Her life seems to be somewhat on hold, and the future is very uncertain for her. She was a fool in love, and now seems to be very much alone. The prosecutor and the media has encouraged her to turn on the Mayor, which I doubt she will do. Hopefully she will reconsider it when the case gets to trial. Once in a major position of power as the Mayor's Chief of Staff, according to the Metro Times' Jack Lessenberry , Christine Beatty is now a shadow of her former self. He saw her at the NAACP Freedom Fund dinner in Cobo Hall last week, and made some observations regarding her in his weekly column.

“....Seen on the sidelines:

Detroit Mayor Kwame Kilpatrick spoke briefly at the Freedom Fund dinner. His remarks were fairly brief and unremarkable. He didn't mention his own trials, upcoming or otherwise, though he did subtly attempt to place himself in a tradition of heroes and martyrs stretching back to Emmett Till.

In a slightly bizarre touch, he referred to the Rev. Wright as a "verbal acrobat," which made me wonder how much the mayor himself understood the meaning of this man. The crowd's reaction to the mayor was interesting too. He received what you might call "polite" applause (the person sitting next to me called it tepid.)

Dennis Archer, who was honored a few minutes later, got a much bigger hand. There was a feeling of mild tension when Kwame was on stage, as if his presence reminded people of things they didn't want to think about. He made a point of reminding people that his wife Carlita was there. Then somebody nudged me; look.

Standing in the entrance to one of the hall's sections, apparently all alone, was a somewhat drawn-looking Christine Beatty, the mayor's former chief of staff and lover, whom he discarded like an old fish wrapper last winter, in an effort to save his own political skin.

Gone was any trace of the famous arrogance that used to be on display. Occasionally people — women, mostly — would come up and offer her a few words, shake her hand, give her a hug.

She neither glanced in the mayor's direction (she was more than a football field away) or, as far as I could tell, looked at the monitor while he spoke. After half an hour or so, she slipped quietly away.”

Real Talk and Real Theft.....

I don't have cable. It is a luxury that I can not afford. It is more important to me to keep a roof over my head, utilities on, food in the house for my kids, and other basic amenities which are so hard to do currently. I did not see the Mayor's new show, "Real Talk." I listened to it on the radio. I hope someone will post it on YouTube.com later, so I can watch it then.

Hearing that Kilpatrick's first guests were City Council President Pro Tem Monica Conyers and Police Chief Ella Bully-Cummings, let me know that everything was going to be staged anyway. After seeing some of the show's clips on the Freep.com this morning, I felt from Bully-Cummings' demeanor, she was compelled to do the show by her boss. Conyers' performance was like a flirty, giddy teenager who is determined to assertive herself. Her demeanor was entirely different from what we see as she spars with fellow council members and what we saw when she had to catch herself while talking to that middle school student last week.


Although the show was cozy and amicable, I still can't help but wonder what does our Mayor have on both of these women? Conyers gave us a hint of whose pocket she is in when she admitted on the radio last week that she supports "strip joints as long as they are not near schools." The ones near me are located near and on nice looking blocks where Detroit citizens who are also parents of school age children. Those folks have and are keeping up their property. So she has no problem that they are situated in the neighborhoods though? I guess as long as she does not see them in her neighborhood, the strip joints in our city are not a problem for Mrs Monica Conyers, who is also a parent of two sons.


Unfortunately, Detroit Council Member and former Motown Singer Martha Reeves got a taste of what the citizens of Detroit have to deal with on a regular basis. Her childhood home was burglarized and audio/recording equipment among other things were taken. As I watched her on TV (WDIV, Channel 4 Detroit), I was amazed at her reaction that nobody saw anything and that someone of her stature did not have insurance on those items.

"I would cry if I wasn't an adult," Reeves said Monday after leaving a long City Council budget session. "And what can I do? You know, the police are not watching the neighborhood. Somebody should have called the police while this was happening. The neighbors are not going to talk."

Shoot, nobody saw anything when my home and the homes of both neighbor's on each side of me were burglarized. I can't get frustrated at my neighbors because they were at work or not watching what is going on outside, nor can they get upset with me. Since the break in, I have tried to get to know my neighbors more so that we can watch out for each other. I do truly feel for Martha Reeves' loss, and hope that the police do recover her property. The police told me that they would file a report after my incident, but was not going to check for evidence, like fingerprints. Both of my neighbors moved some months after their homes were invaded.

So right now I am stuck between two vacant houses. My daughter later found the laptop's screen on Seven Mile Road, but it did not do me any good. I guess whoever tried to sell it got ridiculed because the laptop was so old. The burglar probably got frustrated and destroyed it. But I lost all my writings and data. It taught me to back up my data, and reminded me that material things can be replaced, although it will be a while before I can replace my laptop which was used anyway.

Amazing Elders.............

Currently dealing with a sore back and hip. My back does bother me every now and then, so I can only attribute the latest back problems to either bad posture or the mound of pillows that I have stacked up lately. My hip problem has occurred occasionally through the years, and it has been several years since it has bothered me. By the problem popping up recently, let me know that the cause had to be from lifting during the clinical work done in the class I was taking. I always knew as a child, that my back and hips were not aligned properly, and my mother informed me that I would have problems from it when I got older. Now that the weight is there, I feel those problems even more. I been doing stretching to help alleviate the pain and hope by exercising and soaking in Epsom salts, I will feel better.

But as I read about these folks on Eldr.com, I had to stop feeling sorry for myself. I think I am going to get my young butt in gear and walk around the block because these folks are definitely moving their bones and showing this whipper snapper how to do it!

The Kite Runner

Yesterday, I finally was able to view the movie, “The Kite Runner.” I wanted to see it so bad after reading about the reception that the movie received in Cannes last year. Another film that is similar in that is also shows life in Afghanistan during the Taliban rule is the movie "Osama." It is a movie about a girl in Afghanistan who is disguised as a boy so that she and her mother can work to survive. It was a real tearjerker for me some years ago, and reminded me of the freedoms that we women now take for granted here in the USA.

I was so surprised to find the "The Kite Runner" DVD at my local neighborhood library, but I have not read the book yet. The book by the same name, is written by Khaled Hosseini, who had a small cameo role near the end of the movie. But the story was beautifully told, and had me crying too, which rates as a good movie in my book. To me, the universal concept of redemption is very prominent in the film. Unfortunately, everyone does not see it that way. Controversy did surround the movie upon its release. The young actors that played the bullies in the movie had to be relocated out of the country because of fears for their safety. The family members of one of the actors, also unsuccessfully requested that the rape scene be removed from the film too.

One person that really had me riveted to the screen was the actor that played the father, Baba. His name is Homayoun Ershadi, and is an excellent actor and architect.

But I was very struck about the resemblance that Ershadi had in the movie to the actors Armand Assante and Al Pacino. But they all do share the same intensity when they flesh out a character.

As seen below in the Los Angeles premiere picture, Ershadi in the middle with the other actors from the movie, (Left-Khalid Abdalla (Adult Amir), and Right-Shaun Toub (played Rahim Kahn) does not remotely resemble the Baba character in real life.

Saïd Taghmaoui who played Farid the driver who takes Amir to Afghanistan to rescue his nephew Sohrab, is also well know for his roles in “Three Kings,” and “Hidalgo.” To me, he is one fine actor that can easily play Middle Eastern and Hispanic characters with ease.

Hollywood Diva Shop on Ebay

I have been lusting over this top from Hollywood Diva shop on Ebay.

And this one too!

Since my birthday went by somewhat quietly, (Well, the folks in the class that I was taking last week wished me Happy Birthday!) and I did get 20 bucks from my mother-in-law, I am thinking about getting the brown top, although I am looking at others also. I love the color and fabric since it is Spandex and stretchable. Most of Hollywood Diva's stuff is really nice. After shopping at Sears, Avenue, and Ashley Stewart last week, I did not find items that really inspired me. But the shop does have a lot of nice items for ample girls, and right now they are offering free shipping in the US for Buy It Now auctions!

Spring =Desire, Lust, Sex, & Connections?

As usual Spring signifies new beginnings for me.

Right now I want something new and someone different. I have wanderlust burning in my core, but economics has kept a lid on that inferno at the moment.

It has been a while for me. I would like to date again. I mean a real date.......like go to an event or even a movie, then have a sit down lunch or dinner to get to know the guy. I am not interested in passionate sex right now either. I would just like to connect in a friendly way, and see where it goes. At times I wonder if it is possible here.

Was browsing on Eharmony.com discussion boards and came across an interesting response from a poster named Sarah. It was really a thought provoking answer to another poster's question:

When should you have sex? Ok, the question is when you just started dating someone new, How long before you should have sex with them? without being cheap . mostly if you really like the guy and would like a longterm relationship.

Sarah wrote:

<<I think everyone gave pretty sound advice and of course to each his/her own on the decision of when to sleep with someone. I think you'll know when the right time, but I'm just sharing information.

This came from something someone passed to me so I'm passing it along.

When to be intimate. The last Why Ask Why? asked readers:

"Can you go backwards and slow it down once you've had sex?" What did the Six Foot Blonde have to say? And there it sits. Beckoning us, teasing us with the ripe temptation to come forward. A little closer. Before we realize what’s happening, we have eyes for nothing but the crimson–colored fruit. So we edge closer until eventually, lost of all resolve, we stand there with just the apple core and wonder "how’d that happen?"Erotic. Salacious. Carnal. And lest we forget, desirous. Ah... the slippery, lascivious slope of desire. Once the slide begins, it’s a tad difficult to halt, even if your rational, cognitive mind is saying, "hmmm... acting on this impulsive—albeit, delicious—temptation could complicate my ability to objectively evaluate whether or not this person shares similar goals with me or not. And thus, I might be engaging in an extracurricular activity with someone who doesn’t share enough in common for a substantive relationship."

So instead, we rationalize. How much could it really complicate the dynamic? It’s just sex... and we do like each other.... and we do desire each other. If only it were that simple. And most of us would like to believe it is. After all, we came of age at a time when sex and love were synonyms. But here’s a reality: When you become sexually involved with someone, the two of you share something deeply intimate. And that has inescapable ramifications. Once you’ve blurred the line between "getting-to-know-one-another" and sexual intimacy, someone invariably becomes vulnerable to disappointment, hurt, or misplaced rejection. Because once you share something as intimate as your body with another person, it is very easy to begin to justify that intimacy.

Suddenly, what began as only a lustful tussle becomes precedent to expectations of whether we should expect to spend the weekend together, whether they should be calling us more often, and so on and so on... until we find ourselves in a relationship—but a relationship that isn’t exactly satisfying our expectations. And in our headlong rush to satisfy temptation, we sacrificed our chance to really know our partner before we made ourselves vulnerable to their apathy. Their lack of giving. Their lack of commitment. Or the thousand and one ways someone can relegate us to the bottom of their priority list and show us that we are not special, not worthy of their full attention, love and commitment. And that’s painful. Because it feels like rejection. Can you slow it down? Maybe the better question is: Can you undo carnal escapades and return to the innocence of exploration? No, I don’t think so. Intercourse taints the discourse; sex—or perish the thought, making love—is sacred. Or, I believe sex should be to have the value and meaning we want it to have. And when we allow ourselves to have sex, we have traded something sacrosanct with great meaning for instantaneous lust. And lust without meaning is just that—lust. That’s why it’s imperative to move deliberately and let your actions be motivated and dictated by your true values and morals.

Let the relationship build emotional momentum prior to physical momentum and find someone who desires emotional intimacy first and respects a mutually agreed upon physical boundary. If you believe someone could be the right one or maybe stands a chance at lasting, enduring love, then all the more reason to handle that gift very gingerly, with love and respect for the other. Let lust best serve itself after love has been established based on shared goals, shared trust, and shared experiences. Good things do come to those who wait. It’s not an adage for the trite; it has meaning. Good things come to those who know what they want and are willing to wait and see if the person before them desires the same. Desire can be the fuel that fans the flame of your love. And misplaced desire, without the structure of trust and love, can leave you bitterly cold, disappointed and hurt.

We all desire to get naked with someone. I just happen to advocate waiting until you have seen their most vulnerable, honest self. Wait until you can say, "I not only admire this person, but I want to emulate them because they live their life in a way that is inspiring to me." Two naked souls standing before each other with only honesty, vulnerability, respect and commitment between them: The foundation for a genuine, substantive, enduring relationship. When is the right time to add sex to a relationship? For each it’s different, but I’m fairly confident in saying I don’t believe that a foundation for a lifetime commitment, honor and love is the result of capricious, whimsical, passionate lust. Move deliberately. Love deliberately.">>

I especially loved the part:

<<We all desire to get naked with someone. I just happen to advocate waiting until you have seen their most vulnerable, honest self. Wait until you can say, "I not only admire this person, but I want to emulate them because they live their life in a way that is inspiring to me." Two naked souls standing before each other with only honesty, vulnerability, respect and commitment between them: The foundation for a genuine, substantive, enduring relationship.>>

That piece really made me reflect over my past romantic relationships. It also helped me to ponder the requirements for embarking on potential new ones also. We all want affection and hopefully love too, yet most of us mistakenly accept lust as the standard. As I gingerly step out again, I am going to try to lead with my mind foremost and keep a logical reign on my heart and desire. I also believe that God will put the right person before us also. It is up to us to be able to recognize that person when we encounter them.